Wednesday, January 05, 2005

our wedding anniversary
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I'm not here anymore

You can find me at this website written by my significant other.
It allows me to blog private entries that are password protected.
=) yay!

Monday, August 02, 2004

our wedding anniversary
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yay! finally...

i started this blog back in may when i was feeling very lousy about the relationship... uncertain whether we'd even make it in spite of having booked the dinner location for the singapore wedding dinner. there were so many arguments and so many signs pointing to a breakup... i didn't even feel like looking at our website. in fact looking at it made me even more certain that i should have seen the arguments coming because for one, nothing had been done to the website since march.

in the recent couple of weeks, i've seen wen do more for the site than anything he has done since finding out about the dinner confirmation in may (and there was alot he could have done at that point already in terms of updating the site). he's found code for making our site more sophisticated. for example the ideal guestbook i showed wen eons and eons ago was the one from mona and raven's now-defunct website. i had very clear ideas after all my research on wedding sites and in the last few days, i'm actually beginning to see a clearer picture of what i had pictured of our site. plus of cos the blogging function... that's probably the best part. having my own custom blog with categorization and password protection free!

thinking about our site and the lack of progress for the longest time always brings to mind wen's main passion for many years. and of cos his lousy ass friend... i've always admired how wen is able to sum up a person pretty quickly... but in this case, i guess he somehow just refused to believe that his judgement of this one person was not only inaccurate but a terrible drain on him. or maybe underneath it, he knew that he'd judged this friend wrongly but he was still holding onto some hope. or maybe i am just fated to go thru crap like this in my serious relationships... where there's always this bad friend who wants to influence my guy against me. with tony, it was marvyn... thank god for jasper who valiantly offered to sit on him. it was probably the sweetest thing a guy could have done for me then. =)

maybe that's why i dislike cats. i've had one too many experience of my guy being influenced by his friend. unconditional devotion and love is more important to me than a pet who decides how much affection it can take for the day. who cares if it's smart enough that i have to earn its respect before it will love me. isn't that what we have to do in life with almost all our human relationships? if i have to do that with my pet, at least let me do it in the SIMS game... where I can still switch off the cat, i mean pc.

i miss spikey... and dexter going psychotic on a rainy day does not make it any better.

Friday, July 30, 2004

our wedding anniversary
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cyber olympics

with all the hype about the upcoming summer olympics in greece, it was interesting to read about the cyber olympics being hosted in singapore. interesting because one would never consider singapore a place to host the olympics typically... =D

as i was reading it, my first thought was that wen would probably find this article interesting since he said he was thinking of going into the gaming industry. my next thought was - melvin would probably find this interesting... he plays games so much... but then again, i've been bugging him to make this passion of his into something constructive (like studying related subjects) but it's never come to anything. it's quite sad really that mel is so bochup about everything. somehow our parents gave all the competitive genes to me and net and none was leftover for him. it annoys me to death bcos i know he's capable of so much more if only he'd put his heart into it... but oftentimes it seems like whenever something needs a little more effort from him, he decides its too much trouble. sigh...

oh well back to fun things... apparently the cyber games includes warcraft iii: frozen throne too! that should be fun... unfortunately... it's so dumb... cos this year it's in san franciso and next year it'll be in singapore! now.... if only singapore had won for this year's cyber olympics then next year wen and i could possibly check it out together in san francisco. dammit.... why can't the world work around my schedule!

Thursday, July 29, 2004

our wedding anniversary
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hot water bottle

have my usual numbing pain running down my left neck all the way to my fingers on the left hand. apparently i have a muscle knot in my left arm but i'm thinking the problem probably starts from my neck. it hurts so much... and every direction i creak it, it creaks... meaning, my neck bones are just way too loose for their own good i think. i'm sure it's not a good sign that it creaks so much...

so i've learned this trick to get some temporary relief. fill my nalgene water bottle that i use at the office with hot water n then place it against my neck, roll it along my left arm... basically anything to help ease the pain. it helps! of cos it's nothing more than the temporary relief that the electric balm also gives... but any relief is a good thing no matter how quickly the numb feeling inches back. i'm not even wearing that corset today... so i'm not sure what it is that's causing the pain. maybe because my neck is just not quite curved the way it should be ever since i had those two automobile accidents within the span of nine months. no external injuries except for my black honda accord being scrapped after the second one... but looks like the internal injuries are here to stay for awhile.

how do u even begin to feel chirpy when you're literally smacking yr neck and shoulders every half an hour to get some feeling back into them? and how do u avoid being down when there's a throbbing pain in the side of your head? if you have a foolproof answer to any of the above questions, you could be a millionaire... billionaire even. of cos you could also be someone who believes in miracles...